Ninja Turtle Snuggie Type Thing

Hello Kitty gone Thug

What I learned from watching Christmas movies...

1. If you live in a town where it never snows, or hasn't snowed for years, it will snow by the end of the movie. It will be a Christmas miracle.

2. If you are a rich, successful, heartless, business women, your life will be transformed via a dream or wish. By the end of the movie, you will know what your life has been missing (love and a family).

3. Conversely, if you are a frustrated housewife that gave up your career to have a family, your life will be transformed via a dream or a wish. By the end of the movie, you will know that you had what you wanted all along (love and a family).

4. If your life is floating along perfectly at the beginning of the movie--watch out! Chaos will ensue and that relationship is headed for disaster, but your life will wrap up nicely and you will realize that life is better than before.

5. That annoying coworker, neighbor, or stranger that stole the last "it" toy for this season is starting to look quite attractive aren't they? Despite your hatred for them, you will fall in love by the end of the movie. Surprise! Who saw that coming?

6. If you are related to Santa (a sibling, or child) you will be solely responsible for saving Christmas.

7. If you lived in a small town that went Christmas overboard, you will have to go back for some reason. By the end of the movie, you won't want to leave.

8. Whatever gift you didn't get from Santa that made you stop believing in him, you will receive it by the end of the movie.

My kind of Barbie

New favorite Website!!!

Please go to this website, spend all day, enjoy...
http://www.thirdanddelaware.com/

Liz Liz Liz Liz Liz Liz Liz Liz Liz

Last time I posted without picture, you didn't even see it!!
I wanted to tell you about etsy.com
the website is kinda confusing but they have super cool and cheap stuff on there.
So check it out!
I would just call you, but your at Olive Garden.... without me :(

Ugg: not just for nasty furry boots, now for gross handbags too!

8 fucking years??!!?? wow.

Tavi is cooler then me

So I just heard about this girl (tavi) who is a 13 year old blogger who was just hired by Harper’s Bazaar to write for them... uh, hello can biz and liz get some kind of amazing job opportunity for having a blog? I read an interview with her, and the little brat is funny, articulate, loves designers I've never heard of, takes adorable pictures of herself, shops at thrift stores, and well... made wish I was a thirteen year old fashion genius blogger just like her. Pfffft. this is her blog http://tavi-thenewgirlintown.blogspot.com/

I don't know if this is real or not.

Someone showed me this at work

Best one so far!

I have so many jokes here, but my mom reads this blog!

What if she turned before the last part?

Found this little gem at the restaurant by my work!

Is it wrong for my son to love the swifer sweeper this much?

Scotch Mega Egg

10 reasons why she dumped you

1. You’re Bad in Bed. It can’t be true! She never said anything like that! Yeah, well, women do that. Maybe she tried to school you. Maybe it was her, not you. Maybe you just weren’t sexually compatible. To spare your ego, she never told you. But that’s why she walked out on you. Next time, do not try the helicopter without asking first.

2. It Got Boring. People are always talking about how men like new things, new experiences, new partners. Well, they’re not alone. Women have a secret side that’s like a lone female wolf, and if things get too steady, if you start taking her for granted, it’s possible that she went looking for thrills elsewhere, and elsewhere is where she’ll stay.

3. You’re a Jerk. You think you’re “funny,” but she didn’t think that crack you made about her weight was hilarious. You weren’t that nice to her parents, you eat with your mouth open, and when you get drunk with your buddies, you turn into a total pig. She knows you’re a nice guy underneath it all, but there was too much BS in the way to make it worth it.

4. You Weren’t Getting Anywhere. Here are some qualities women like in men: ambitious, driven, goal-oriented. It’s OK if you hit a slump, but if your career hit the skids, and, oh, a year later you aren’t able to bounce back, there’s going to be trouble in this love valley. It’s not what you do, or how much you make, but women dig a man who makes the most of who he is.

5. You’re Commitment-Phobic. Couldn’t get monogamous? Wouldn’t move in together? Can’t find the balls to propose? Women seek out security and stability, and there comes a time in every relationship when it’s either, er, do your business or get off the pot. If you couldn’t take things to the next level, you’ve only got yourself to blame for the fact that she walked out the door.

6. She’s Just Not That into You. Hey, we’re not the only ones out there who someone just isn’t that into! Whether the spark died, she wasn’t that into you in the first place but it took her a while to realize it, or she got in a mood, a permanent mood, she may have split because she wasn’t feeling it. Go find someone else who is so into you.

7. A Dealbreaker Secret. Sometimes, women hold things back. They don’t disclose everything. They’ve got a secret in their past. She used to be a stripper. She had an abortion. She never got over her ex. For some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to tell you. For her, that’s what stands between you two, and, unable to share who she really is with you, she went in search of someone else to whom she could reveal her true self.

8. She Met Someone Else. Yeah, it happens, and if he did what a man is supposed to do better than you, in her opinion, she looks at it as trading up. If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.

9. You Let Yourself Go. If a guy leaves a girl because she “let herself go,” everyone gets offended. But it’s possible that if you let yourself go, she left you because of it. If she was going to the gym five days a week, and your idea of a workout is lifting the beer from the table to your mouth, it’s possible that, um, your exercise routines were the problem.

10. You Cheated. You slipped once. It happens! You came clean. She forgave you. You even went to couples therapy together. Eventually, you moved beyond it. But ... did she? Women never forget anything, and it may be that she was never able to get over it. What can you do? Move on. Try again. Do better next time. You learned something, right?

Found this on sketchysanta.com

Email from my Mama

Things to Ponder...
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is GREAT need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least KIND OF tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Mom what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
19. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
20. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

We could start a new blog called Gross pictures of Lindsey Lohan

I finally watched the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving from my DVR finally